Controlling Your Anger

The reason we have anger management is to try reduce both your emotional feelings and your physiological arousal that causes the anger. You can’t really get rid of the anger or even avoid, the people or things that make you angry, nor can you change them, but you could learn how to control your actions.

Are you angry too often?

There are psychological tests that are able to measure the intensity of your angry feelings, how prone you are to getting angry and how you handle it. If you find yourself acting in a certain way that seems frightening and out of control, you may want to get some help with finding better ways to deal with these emotions.

Why are some of us more angry than others?

According to Jerry Deffenbacher, PhD, who is a psychologist specialising in anger management, there are some people who really are more “angry” than others, they get worked up much easier and more intensely. There are also people who don’t show that they are angry in the normal loud ways but they are chronically grumpy and irritable.

People who are easily angered do not always throw things around and curse; sometimes they sulk, withdraw socially or get physically ill. Those who are prone to getting angry easily, often have what some psychologists call a lower tolerance for frustration, which means that they simply feel like they should not have to be subjected to frustration, annoyance or inconvenience. They battle to take things in stride, and they will get particularly angry if the situation seems unjust in any way: for example, having someone correct them for a minor mistake. But what makes these people be this way? It’s a number of things. One of the causes can be genetics or physiological: there is evidence that some babies are born touchy, irritable and easily angered, and that these specific signs are present from a very young age. Another reason can be sociocultural. Anger is very often regarded as a negative feeling; we are taught that is it acceptable to express depression, anxiety or other emotions but not to express anger. As a result of this, we do not learn how to deal with it correctly. Research studies have also shown that your family background can play a role too. Very often, those who are easily angered come from families that are chaotic, disruptive and not skilled at emotional communications.

At Dynamic Seminars we offer training seminars on many different practical skills including anger management. Visit the Dynamic Seminars website on www.trainbook.co.za for more information.

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